Don't Go in the Woods


Action / Horror


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February 28, 2015 at 04:19 AM



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698.29 MB
23.976 fps
1hr 22 min
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1.24 GB
23.976 fps
1hr 22 min
P/S 6 / 0

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by DocEmmettBrown 1 / 10

You can do better than that!

CONTAINS SPOILERS. I recently had the pleasure of seeing this 'video nasty' after so many years of it having been kept under lock and key by our beloved BBFC.

Now, if there was a British Board of Film Quality I could understand the ban, as this is one of the most useless pieces of drivel I have ever seen.

It's hard to know where to start; the acting is abhorrent, even by badfilm standards. The 'actors' frequently talk over each other, repeat lines ad infinitum (one actress makes her way through the entire film with the words huh? and no!), cast members stand rooted to the spot as if reading a cue card.

The plot is non-existent, and I mean NON-EXISTENT, Friday The 13th looks like Lost Highway in comparison. A group of annoying teens (aren't they always) trek through a forest as a wildman kills random people who have nothing to do with the plot!!! They're just crowbarred in there. The most ludicrous being a wheelchair bound guy struggling to get up a woodland path ON HIS OWN! Why is he there? It makes no sense! The plot has so many holes, like why is there an undiscovered wildman living in a huge cabin in the woods that no one has ever seen before, why did he kidnap the baby, is the baby left in the woods to die (or, as I think it suggests, become another wildman, as if a baby has natural survival skills when left alone in a wood). Why do the police let the two survivors just wander off home on their own at the end?

The score is painful, jumping between country guitar, bontempi organ, and screechy horror soundtrack. The FX are lame, the direction is dreadful, the editing is childlike, the cast are all ugly. THIS FILM IS RUBBISH!

On a positive note, the film does contain an (unintentionally) hilarious over use of the name Dick.

I know, like myself, this review will only serve to inflame your need to see this movie, but please, do yourselves a favour, stay well clear. You have been well and truly warned.

NURSE! I'd like to go back to my room!

Reviewed by captaincracker 2 / 10

Proof That Anyone Can Make a Movie

There isn't that much to say about "Don't Go in the Woods". It is basically the most uninspired slasher film I've seen, and that's saying something from a guy who has seen every sequel, prequel, remake, and knock-off, and who in particular loves early 80's slasher gold. This is fool's gold. So what makes this movie worse than flicks like "Madman", "The Burning", "Prom Night", "The Prowler", and "Graduation Day"?

For starters, "Don't Go in the Woods" has absolutely no originality to it. The movie is basically a complete knock-off of the previous year's "Just Before Dawn", only "Woods" has more characters and deaths but lacks the atmosphere, suspense, and twist of "Dawn". This film is absolutely amateur in its making. It has a great atmosphere to use and doesn't use it. It doesn't allow any room for character development. Rather than creating suspense it jumps right to the kill. There is simply no use of artistic film-making or creativity in this entire flick.

Earlier in the week I finally was able to see another infamous B-movie slasher, "Graduation Day", which I thought was missing something. Compared to "Woods", "Graduation Day" looks like a masterpiece. "Graduation Day", along with "Friday the 13th", "The Burning", "Madman", "The Prowler", "Happy Birthday to Me", "Prom Night", "Halloween", "A Nightmare on Elm Street", "House on Sorority Row", "Just Before Dawn", "My Bloody Valentine", and others may follow a simple formula but it knows how to make that formula entertaining. Those movies have a rhythm. "Don't Go in the Woods" has no rhythm, but seems more like a bunch of footage of random, annoying people we don't care about or like getting killed in uneventful ways.

Watching this movie felt like it was taking hours, even though it was only 85 minutes. So why would I continue watching "Don't Go in the Woods"? It is a movie from a time period that will never return. Movies like "Woods" will never be released again. This is a grindhouse picture - a low-budget, cheesy movie that played in limited cinemas and never went mainstream. It has earned a large cult fanbase over the past thirty years, and the title has become infamously famous for being a bad movie. For a horror fan, "Woods" is a sort of time capsule, a look back in time to when anyone could make a slasher movie as long as you had a camera. This time has come and gone, and has been forgotten about. For over twenty years, no one thought about "Woods", but the internet and DVD sales have helped bring it back.

The cult horror film "Don't Go in the Woods" is only a popular movie because it is so bad and at one point so unpopular. As a slasher film fan, I am glad to have seen it. The acting is atrocious, the writing is wretched, the effects and laughable, and the plot is absent. But with a few cool shots of the scenery, "Don't Go in the Woods" somehow can keep the audience's minds off its lack of substance. And does this movie really need any substance? That's a debatable question.

Definitely only a movie for hardcore slasher fans. Regular genre fans will most probably get bored and turn it off, and if you don't like horror movies or bad b-movies than steer clear and don't enter "the Woods".

Reviewed by HumanoidOfFlesh 6 / 10

Pure schlock.

"Don't Go in the Woods" is often regarded as the worst slasher movie ever made.I can honestly say that I have seen worse slasher flicks like "Hollow Gate","The Last Slumber Party" or "The Newlydeads".A crazy killer stalks and kills tourists and campers in the woods.Anyway,this film is without a doubt beyond horrible.The acting is incredibly awful and both female leads are uglier than hell.The music is abysmal,the script makes no sense and the cinematography is really weak.The killer is just an old bearded guy who doesn't even have a motive or reason for killing campers.Fortunately this slasher flick is never boring and it contains many gory murders(for example a photographer guy gets his arm ripped off,a crippled guy is decapitated).So if you are a fan of trashy and mindless Z-grade slasher flicks give this one a look.

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