The Funhouse Massacre


Action / Comedy / Horror

Rotten Tomatoes Critics - Rotten 60%
Rotten Tomatoes Audience - Upright 67%
IMDb Rating 5.3 10 1774


Uploaded By: FREEMAN
Downloaded 1,612 times
June 20, 2016 at 03:34 AM



Scottie Thompson as Sheriff Kate
Clint Howard as Taxidermist
Robert Englund as Warden
Chasty Ballesteros as Christina
720p 1080p
657.71 MB
23.976 fps
1hr 30 min
P/S 3 / 2
1.37 GB
23.976 fps
1hr 30 min
P/S 2 / 3

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by BA_Harrison 6 / 10

This massacre was more fun than I thought it would be.

With a title that is a mash-up of two Tobe Hooper horror classics—The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and The Funhouse—it's obvious from the start that The Funhouse Massacre isn't going to offer much in the way of originality: it's Halloween night, a group of lunatics have escaped from a high security mental asylum and are killing the patrons of a fun-house. Nope, not much new there! Still, at least the film never pretends to be anything other than a whole load of silly splattery fun, its tongue firmly in cheek as the psychopaths slash, chop, smash, slice and dice their way through the attraction's blissfully unaware customers, who believe that the killing is all part of the show—at least until it is their turn to die.

It takes a while to get to the really bloody stuff (the last act is where the best effects happen, including a couple of cool decapitations), but when it does, The Funhouse Massacre proves very enjoyable nonsense, each psycho having their own unique method of dispatching victims: Animal the Cannibal (E.E. Bell) eats them (obviously), demented dentist Dr. Suave (Sebastian Siegel) uses an unusually large drill to treat 'patients', The Taxidermist (Clint Howard) guts and stuffs people, Rocco the Clown (Mars Crain) uses a 'test your strength' hammer to crush heads, and The Stitch Face Killer sews shut the eyes and mouth. Meanwhile Mental Manny (Jere Burns) oversees the carnage, which features some surprisingly good gore effects (just checked the credits and Robert Kurtzman was involved, so maybe not so surprising after all).

Reviewed by GL84 9 / 10

Really fun and enjoyable slasher effort

Escaping from jail, several serial killers take up hiding in plain sight at a haunted house designed after their original criminal sprees and decide to torment the guests trapped inside, forcing those still alive to wonder how to stop them in order to escape the carnival alive.

This one here was quite the fun and enjoyable slasher. There's a lot of solid work here with this one really managing to go for quite the fun amount of time here with this one really generating it's best scenes here because it's focus is on the number of maniacs on the loose. Putting the number at this high is quite a strong feat which is heralded along by the fact that the main location is a carnival funhouse that's based around their actual crimes for the unsuspecting and totally disbelieving locals. That really makes for the film to go through a rather original feature in the first half of the kids going through the set-ups unaware they're watching the actual killers recreating their crimes on victims as this is all assumed to be just an act with prosthetics and the various encounters here become all the more fun later on where their bodies are added to the attractions for the next round of contestants to witness which really adds to the deranged and demented atmosphere here. Those attractions, from the taxidermist cutting up the bodies to the dentist drilling into people, the deranged clown ripping people to pieces, the cannibal cutting up and devouring them and the female joker running around maniacally slicing up bodies all makes for the absolutely crazy and frenetic experience that makes for quite a great running time throughout here. The strong sense of action carries nicely into the final half here with this one moving along into the general freak-off out of the people realizing the actions are real and scoring plenty of fun here with the whole idea of the carnival getting massacred in quick-shot kills by their encounters with the killers running loose as there's a lot of fun brawls mixed into the action for a wholly enjoyable sense of fun throughout here that's made all the better with the final's fun use of realistic prosthetics for the gore effects here which is half the fun of these scenes alone which is yet another fun part to this one. These here all make this one quite a lot of fun and manage to hold it up over it's one main flaw. The one big issue with the film is the fact that there's a somewhat uneven pace throughout here that drags this one out, which is felt in the first half as it takes way too long to finally decide to go to the carnival in the first place as there's not a whole lot of worthwhile work done here to make them interesting in going to the show. This makes the film take a while to get going, and it's quite fun once it does but that takes a while. The bumbling deputy also isn't funny and became almost detrimental here in that it started pointing towards how he graduated from the academy his stumbling around was that bad, and these scenes here really affect the film as a whole.

Rated R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language, Brief Nudity, a sex scene and drug use.

Reviewed by thesar-2 5 / 10

The Name Says It

Hey now. I'm supposed to visit my first "Haunted Funhouse" (actually 10 of them) next weekend at Kings Island in Ohio…and after watching this, I don't think so.

Not that this movie was the scariest film I've seen, but the concept and some of the execution was enough for me to probably sit that visit out.

The very basic of the plot here is that "five or six" mental patients are set free on Halloween night and they take over a Halloween Funhouse where they proceed to slaughter countless participants while we have a group of young adult friends plus a hilariously understaffed police force we follow and care about living through this {insert title here.}

The movie is probably 50/50 lite comedy and extreme gory horror and likewise, 50% of the humor works and 50% of the horror works. Luckily the positive parts are worth the entire attraction. I did find myself laughing out loud at times and freaked completely out during other scenes.

Of course, that leaves the missing 50% on both sides. Some of the jokes fell flat and some of the kills were so outrageously unrealistic, it couldn't be taken remotely seriously. Too bad, because they had something here. A place people could get slaughtered in front of others and no one would be the wiser. In fact, they relished in it. At least, in this scenario.

I rarely say this about a movie I just watched and came out less than a year ago: REMAKE THIS MOVIE. If you've seen this, can you possibly imagine if this was played straight without any comedy or the many attempts at homages to the slasher subgenre? (Oh, and for the record, most of those also fell flat and the John Carpenter's Halloween-Theme music never fit. Sorry Mr. Composer…you were just a Con-poser.)

If this movie was a straight up massacre horror in which people were offed in a Halloween Funhouse where you're supposed to be scared, but still make it out in one piece, it would probably kill at the box office, pardon the pun. Sure, I did enjoy the humor at times and the light tones did make me a little less jumpy, but if they remade this movie in dead seriousness, I probably wouldn't sleep for days.

Eh. Here, nor there. It's a thoroughly gory ride that, thankfully never crosses the line since we're supposed to be having a fun time. Amateurish at times – definitely had a direct-to-Chiller-Network feel – it never excels to "real movie" status and yet, it's definitely a passable horror-comedy.

Just too bad said "comedy" was really bad at times. The movie Scream this was not, but a distant cousin you can freely visit once in a while.


Final thoughts: Day 5 Movie in the Can! I'm watching a NEW-2-ME horror movie every day of October 2016 and this one I've wanted to see for a while now. Originally, I thought this was a remake to the original 1981 movie: The Funhouse, which I finally saw a year or so ago. That 35-year- old movie did not live up to my expectations, so I was hoping this new version would.

NOTE: it is NOT a remake. Just both are horror films involving funhouses.

Oh and one more final thought: who the hell opens their Halloween funhouse ON HALLOWEEN NIGHT? NO ONE DOES. Ours, here in Arizona, open a month prior and run every week until Halloween. I've never been to one, as I previously stated (until next weekend…maybe) but from what I'm told, the lines are extremely long and each sells out night after night during October…so why the hell would anyone open one, like they did in this movie, on the last night of the fright-season? Inconceivable!

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